Risks Of Temporary Separations For The Couple

We cannot forget that temporary separations can be a double-edged sword, as they can serve to lose the other or be the prelude to a final breakup.

It is common for couples to have problems with misunderstanding or conflicts.  The real problem arises when the question continues over time. Are temporary separations in the couple a risk?

Sometimes, situations arise where strong arguments are maintained in the couple. Guests arrive, everything calms down and therefore the discussion no longer seems so important.

People who have been in a relationship for a long time know the therapeutic effect of temporary separation.

It can act as a revitalizing element and helps to temporarily reduce the escalation of interpersonal tension. But not in all cases.

• All couples have many things in common, but the differences cannot be ignored.
• These are usually not the source of the conflict, but it is their mishandling that causes temporary separations in the couple.

How long should temporary separations last?

Although there are many opinions about it, the ideal separation time is between two and six months, to reduce tension.

Some risks in temporary separations

Damping system

Many times the request for a temporary separation can be used as a subtle euphemism for ending a relationship.

• The purpose of the couple is not to hurt each other . We suggest you a moment of reconsideration, meditation and analysis of the situation.
  
• The problem is that you are really only trying to reduce or soften the final blow: ending the relationship.

Lack of agreement in the decision

One of the risks involved in temporary separations in a couple is that the partners do not both agree. This implies that one of the people does not believe in separation as a method of correcting what is happening.

What should be done? Set clear goals and intentions. The idea is that no one wastes time.

See separation as a solution

It is important to consider that separation is not always a good solution. But, rather, f apart from it.

• By simply being separated, the differences within the couple will not be resolved and the routines that led to the separation will not automatically be revolutionized.
• The most appropriate thing is to ask for the help of a therapist during this process, to avoid frustration or inconclusive results.
  

Promises that cannot be fulfilled

After deciding to try a period of separation, the couple must decide what they can and cannot change to satisfy each other.

At this point of negotiation, honesty and commitment will be indispensable. The ideal is to make promises that can be fulfilled over time.

Time and how to avoid despair

You should only go along with the requests that are important to you and not do it just to please the other person.

• If time has been requested, you must give it time. This will both heal yourself and channel what you need in your relationship. It will also help set goals, in case you get back together.
  
• Mentally prepare to let go. This temporary separation can be prolonged. You both need to be ready when deciding whether to continue your life separately or resume the relationship.  It is not a simple task, but the best thing is to try to resume the activities that were previously carried out in the company. Now is the time to do them yourself.
• Do not show that you are desperate. If a couple decides to take time, and they don’t allow themselves enough “time” and distance, the relationship can suffer.  If this happens, you are not giving rise to the loneliness that requires temporary separation. This could lead to a definitive break.

Separation may not be the solution